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yuuuFriendship means different things to different people. To some it is all about those that are close to them and to others it is about those they hang out with or spend a lot of time together but I would like to define friendship as friends in a ship. In a more personal term, the number of friends you have among the people around you. We are connected to a whole lot of people, some family, some colleagues and some schoolmates, yet friends are those people we are connected to and those we are not connected to that we bring closer to ourselves because they came closer or they have also brought us closer to themselves. Once we are approached in a friendly way, courtesy demands we respond likewise, and before you know, it could give birth to a new relationship. But that I am friendly does not make me your friend, I’m just a friend who don’t really want to know much about you but just needed to be close to you.

If success can be an enemy to itself, then some people you call friends are not truly your friends. So who really is a friend and who is not? Till tomorrow, I still believe you have to choose your friends because friendship is not by force but by choice. However, that am not your friend does not make me your enemy I’m either a friend that you have not yet met or a friend that won’t come close. So it is not everyone close to you or those that hangout or spend time with you that are your friends. Therefore it is not everyone you call friends that are your friends and not everyone in your ship are you friend. So the big question is among all the people around you, how many of them are you friends?

How many enemies do you have in your ship? To some, people around them who actually wants to bring them down are more than those who actually wants to see them progressing. We are in a situation whereby anybody can be a friend and anybody can also be an enemy. But since we can’t tell who is who by looking at faces because it is not written on our foreheads, we then have to be cautious of people we choose to become part of our lives.

That I eat, drink and even walk with you does not mean much or that I don’t eat, drink or walk with you means less. It is my intentions towards you that make me your friend and your intentions toward me that make you my friend. But why do people want to be close? Are they after what we have? Or are they really interested in our lives?  The problem is, some people initially came with good intentions and it was a good idea you accepted their friends request but along the way, their intentions latter changed and was fighting your purpose. It is at such moment that you unfriend them else they will bring you down. But most frightening are people who show up with the favour we need and those who shows up with a gift and a word of appreciation. They become your friend indeed. So at this point, you should be able to know those for and against you.  Keep away from those that needs to and continue with those that are meant to be. Yet the truth is, you don’t actually know how many people around you are friends because you will only discover some were not, when they introduce their end game. The point is you can’t do without friends, you can’t stop being friendly but you can pray that no man, friend or foe should be able to bring you down.

About itycharles

There is so much to tell about me but unfortunately i know just little about myself because everyday i keep discovering who i am and who i am not hence i wake up in the morning ready to be who ever i am.



  1. This was more complicated than I expected! I liked the parts defining friendship, also understood about some are not friends, actually cannot trust them. I gave up two friends in my life, both were not always “for” me. They sometimes were all about themselves, and sometimes they were not able to be supportive, and lastly, they were negative people who “sucked” my energy. I liked this and hope these comments support your post!

    Posted by reocochran | July 10, 2013, 1:43 am
    • A big thank you for stopping by….. i still believe friendship is a matter of choice

      Posted by itycharles | July 10, 2013, 1:46 am
      • I know and agree, since I chose to walk away from some who were not helpful or kind or positive. I think it is not necessary to stay friends just because you have been for a long time. If the roles are too strenuous, you are carrying the “weight” of the friendship on your shoulders, then it is not friendship. Like the song, “He Ain’t Heavy, He’s My Brother” goes, if you don’t take turns, to me, it is not sisterly or friendly.

        Posted by reocochran | July 26, 2013, 1:29 am
  2. Such an interesting way to put it! Life can be so complicated when it comes to relationships with ppl :-\

    Posted by Caleb Gee | July 10, 2013, 1:46 am
  3. I agree. I am very particular on family, friends , and aquintances. I may invite an aquintance to my house but that in itself does not make them a friend.

    Posted by mkesling63 | July 10, 2013, 6:23 am
  4. Giving up on a friendship is one of the hardest parts – when I discover that they were in my life for a reason (or I was in theirs for a reason) but that time is over and we are traveling down different paths and we don’t need that friendship with each other anymore. I still will grieve a bit for that loss, but move on and open myself to the next friendship that will enter my life! Excellent post!

    Posted by Kate @ Did That Just Happen? | July 10, 2013, 3:11 pm

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